翻译擂台第45期点评
发布时间:2021年01月06日
发布人:nanyuzi  

【原文】


无法重来的2020,请别太为难自己(节选)


小北


[1]最近一个话题讨论:这一年重新来过,你愿意吗?

[2]我想对不少人来说,2020年都是极其艰辛的一年,有些人失去了健康,有些人失去了爱情,也有些人失去的是整个人生。……

[3]在人生里的至暗时刻,每一步都是难熬和折磨,但每个人都是咬着牙熬过来的你也绝对不能够认输。……

[4]其实人生就是这样,很多时候只要走好脚下的那一步就好了,不要担心接下来的事情,也不要去想未来的路有多远有多困难。

[5]先迈出第一步,不管接下来发生什么,一步一步来,你总会抵达你希望抵达的地方。那时,你可以惊奇而自豪地回头看看,自己所走过的路程是多么漫长。

[6]所以啊,相信不管之前的你失去了多少珍贵的东西,又遇到了多么艰难的难题,但2021年一定会如约而至,你也一定会有个新的开始。


2020年注定会作为一个分水岭载入人类史册。在辞旧迎新时刻,此文表达了释怀过去、珍惜现在、相信未来的心愿。


就题目而言,“无法重来的2020,请别太为难自己”,许多人都按其字面意思译成“The year 2020 cannot come once again. Please treat yourself well”“You can never live 2020 again, so please don’t push yourself too hard”“The 2020 is irretrievable , please be kind to yourself”“Take It Easy As 2020 Never Returns”“Stop bothering yourself for no second 2020”“Take Things Easy Please: 2020 to be Gone for Good”等,其实更可“意译”些,即让过去的过去,要善待自己:Let Bygones Be Bygones, Don’t Be Too Hard on Yourself (Excerpt)。当然,“Let 2020 Pass, Let You Off”亦是可取的。


对于[1],“最近一个话题讨论:这一年重新来过,你愿意吗?”,一般容易译成“A latest hot topic goes like: Will you take the chance, if possible, to live the year of 2020 again?”“There was a topic recently: would you like to reset 2020?”“At the end of 2020, a widely discussed topic comes. Would you like to have a second chance of this year?”等,但还可更口语化些,并加引号。


这部分可以译为:Recently, a topic of conversation seems to be lingering around: “Don’t you want 2020 to repeat itself?”


[2]中,“极其艰辛的一年”译成a very difficult year、an incredibly harsh year、an extremely eventful year等,都有一定道理。


“整个人生”不必译成the entire/whole life,而应根据英文的表达习惯加以简化。


故此,这部分可译为:For many of us, I think, this year has been extremely tough – some have lost their health, some their loved ones and some even lives…


[3]中,“每一步都是难熬和折磨”,很多参赛者译成people stepped forward with unbearable pains and tortures、every step is full of sufferance and pain、every step is hard and tormented等,固然可取,但也可进一步变通、简化。


“但每个人都是咬着牙熬过来的,你也绝对不能够认输”,一般译成“Everyone gritted their teeth to through this period, and you can do it. Never yield to difficulties.”“everyone is biting the bullet to get through it. You should not give up either”“Everyone hold their breath and make it through, so don’t quit, either. ...”等,其实该段话的主旨是,每个人只要竭力坚持、永不言败,就会挺过来。“认输”可以用concede defeat,也可以用throw in the towel。


该部分不妨译为:In the darkest moments of life, every day was a struggle, but we have all fought with clenched teeth and come through. You shall never concede defeat.


[4]中,“其实人生就是这样”,不必译成“In fact, life is like this”,而英文的惯用语是“This is life!”。如:①This is life, people!(人们啊,这就是人生!)②But they have no choice, because this is life.(但他们别无选择,因为这就是生活。)③People call this ECHO, but really this is LIFE.(人们称这为“回音”,但实际上这就是“人生”。)④Because this is life. Whether you willing or not, we will be submerged in the river of time.(因为,这就是生活。不管你愿不愿意,我们都将会被淹没在时间的河流里。)


“脚下的那一步”,不必译成take every step on your feet。


“未来的路有多远有多困难”,亦不必是how far and difficult of the road in the future,而可根据其实质作些相应变通。


故这部分不妨译为:This is life! Most of the time what you need to do is to concentrate on the present, and don’t worry too much about the rough road ahead of you.


对于[5],“先迈出第一步”,若译成“As long as you can take your first step”“taking the first step forward, then…”“just take your first step without…”等,固然可以,但更深一步的理解是“坚定意志,往前走”:following your initial move, persevere, …


“惊奇而自豪地”(回头看看),是副词作状语,可用介词with表述。


“自己所走过的路程是多么漫长”是那时会意识到的结果,需用增词处理。


因而,该部分不妨译为:Following your initial move, persevere, step by step, and regardless of whatever happens, you will reach your goal eventually. By that time, you may look back with wonder and pride, realizing how long your journey has been.


对于[6],“所以啊,相信不管之前的你失去了多少珍贵的东西,又遇到了多么艰难的难题,但2021年一定会如约而至,你也一定会有个新的开始”,如果完全遵循原文字面意思,会使译文出现许多不妥之处,如“So, please believe that no matter how many precious things you lost before and how difficult problems you encountered, the 2021 will come as promised and you will have a new start.”“So, I am convinced that no matter how much treasure you have lost and no matter how difficult problem you have experienced before, 2021will arrives as promise and you will definitely have a new start.”“So, I believe that no matter how many precious things you have lost before and how difficult problems you have encountered, 2021 will definitely arrive as scheduled, and you will definitely have a new start.”等。原文其实可以这样理解:“不管之前你失去了多少宝贵的东西,遇到了多少难题,2021年都会如约而至,相信你也会有一个新的开始。”就是说,“相信”的重点不是“失去了多少珍贵的东西”等,而是“有个新的开始”,因而恰恰应该用“忘记”(你所失去的东西),即:forget about how many precious things you have lost。


“2021年都会如约而至”是一种客观规律,若平铺直叙地译出,便没有意义,而应表现以信心去迎接。


“也会有一个新的开始”是指经过种种艰难困苦之后,未来仍有希望,可借用美国经典文学作品《飘》(Gone with the Wind)结尾的名句:Tomorrow is another day.


因而,这部分不妨译为:So, forget about how many precious things you have lost, what a rough time you have been through, embrace 2021 with confidence, for “tomorrow is another day!”


的确,凡事都要面对现实,并报以乐观态度。英语里有half glass of water的比喻:A pessimist sees a glass that's half empty; an optimist sees a glass half full.(悲观的人看到杯子里有一半是空的,而乐观的人则看到杯子里有一半是满的。)对于人生、学习、做事,这都不乏启示。


优胜译文:


@杨玺 Grissom


You can never live 2020 again, so please don’t push yourself too hard. (Excerpt)


by Xiao Bei


Should you be able to live this year all over again, will you relive it? That is a much-discussed topic recently.

I believe that for many people, 2020 has been an extremely tough year, in which some lost their health, some lost their love, and some even lost their entire life. …

In the darkest hours of life, although every step forward means hardship and suffering, in the end everyone will get over it with gritting teeth. And in no way should you give in. …

In fact, this is how life is. More often than not, you only need to look out for the step right in front of you. Don’t worry about what comes next, and don’t think about how long and arduous the path ahead is.

Just take your first step, regardless of whatever happens next. Step by step you will eventually reach your destination. Till then, you can look back with surprise and pride, and see what a long journey you have gone through.

So please have faith, no matter what precious belongings you may have lost, or what difficult problems you may have encountered, that 2021 will surely come as promised, just like you will surely have a brand-new restart.


@Sofia


Do Not Bother For the Past 2020


Xiaobei


Recently, a topic has drawn attention: Are you willing to reexperience 2020 in a different way?

2020 is a tough year for many people as some have lost health, some have lost love and others have even lost the entire life.

In the darkest time of life, everyone struggles to get through with every challenging step forward, and you are no exception——never should you give up.

This is life. It is enough to focus on the path under your feet without worrying about the following happenings nor the distance and difficulties of the future path.

Take the first step. No matter what happens next, you, step by step, are destined to reach where you have been expecting. Then, you will be surprised and proud to look back on how long the path is!

Please believe that no matter how many valuable things you have lost and no matter how challenging problems you have suffered, 2021 is to come and you are to have a new start.


@ Nicholas


Please Don’t Be Too Hard on Yourself for the Never-to-Return 2020 (Excerpt)


Xiao Bei


“Will you start this year all over again?”, so goes a topic of recent discussion.

The year of 2020, I believe, is a time of extreme adversity to many people, for some may have lost their health, some their love, and others their entire life……

In the darkest hour of life, every step is filled with torment and torture, but everyone pulls it off with their teeth clenched, so you mustn’t give in……

Actually, this is the way of life: much of the time all you need to do is focus on the step you’re currently taking, without worrying about what happens next or how distant and difficult the road ahead is.

Make the first move, no matter what comes afterwards. Step by step, you will arrive at your desired destination. Then, you can look back, proudly surprised to find how far you have gone.

So believe me, whatever precious things you were deprived of and whatever enormous challenges you were confronted with in 2020, the year of 2021 will come in due course and you will be blessed with a new beginning.


@白衣卿相


Please let 2020 go


Xiaobei


Recently, there is a hot topic for discussion, namely, if possible, are you willing to live in 2020 again?

I believe 2020 is an extremely difficult time for many people. Some has lost their health, some love, and some even their whole lives...

In the darkest hours of one’s life, every step is rough and torturing. However, everyone toughs it out eventually, therefore, you, as well, must not give up...

In fact, this is life. In most of the time, all we need to be concerned about is the actions we should take at present, rather than burning ourselves out with the distant and arduous journey we will face in the future.

Take the first step, whatever happens subsequently, and take it step by step, and eventually you will arrive at your destination. Then, you can look back at your long journey with surprise and pride.

Therefore, whatever precious things you have lost, or whatever difficult puzzles you have encountered, 2021 will arrive on time, and you, my friend, will have a fresh start.